Introduction
As a foreigner in Korea, I often get this question from Koreans:
"Why do you live in Korea?!"
My simple answer is "I came to Korea for the love of K-Pop group, TWICE", but the full story goes deeper. When I first arrived, I immediately felt a deep connection to the country. In fact, my journey of settling in Korea has been a careful preparation spanning more than 15 years, made up of many small steps.
The question often stems not just from curiosity, but from a genuine inability to see their country through an outsider's lens. Many Koreans are so caught up in their daily lives, hustling through work, managing responsibilities, and just getting by day to day, that they rarely pause to appreciate the unique benefits and beauty of their own country. It's like how a fish might not understand the concept of water until it experiences life beyond it. In this post I just want to highlight both sides of the story.
The Position of a Foreign Residents
Living in Korea as a foreigner offers a different perspective that many locals find hard to understand.
While we get to enjoy all the perks Korea has to offer, like safety, convenience, and cultural variety we also have the privilege of experiencing it from a different angle.
Unlike many of our Korean friends, we're not bound by the intense pressures of climbing the corporate ladder at a big company or the complex expectations of family obligations. We can choose how deeply we want to integrate into local customs and social norms, giving us a flexibility that most Koreans don't have.
What makes our experience even more special is our ability to compare life here with our experiences from other countries, a perspective that many Koreans haven't had the opportunity to develop. We bring an outsider's mindset, observing both the things that work exceptionally well in Korea and those that don't, without making value judgments. What's more, we have the flexibility to choose our level of involvement. Being integrated into Korean society doesn't mean completely adopting the Korean mindset or abandoning our own values. Instead, we can thoughtfully select which aspects resonate with us, saying "This mindset makes sense" or quietly disagreeing without feeling the need to challenge local perspectives.
Another benefit of being a foreigner in Korea who doesn't fully understand the language is a certain immunity to the constant stream of negative news. While staying informed is important, not being bombarded by the 24/7 news cycle of doom and gloom can actually be mentally healthier. It allows us to focus on our daily experiences and immediate community rather than getting caught up in the constant media narrative about Korea's challenges.
This "language barrier benefit" means we can choose when and how much news we want to consume, rather than being involuntarily exposed to it everywhere. It helps maintain a more balanced perspective of life here, focused on our actual experiences rather than media-driven anxieties.
The Appeal of Korean Life
My personal appreciation for Korea comes from multiple aspects of daily life here. The incredible safety and reliable infrastructure stand out immediately, unlike my experiences in Germany where train delays are common, Korean public transportation just works! The convenience is remarkable too, from seamless delivery services that bring packages right to my door without the hassle of chasing down delivery drivers that I experienced in Germany.
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What truly makes my life special here is the strong sense of community in my neighborhood, that I have built. I've made it a point to greet everyone I pass by, leading to heart warming connections. My Korean friend was amazed at how many people I know, joking that I seemed like the neighborhood mayor. I've also built wonderful relationships within both the foreign community of startups and my local MMA gym with mostly Koreans.
However, these benefits didn't just come, they're the result of my consistent effort to engage with my community and actively participate in local life. This proactive approach is why I've avoided the loneliness and social struggles that some foreigners experience here.
Acknowledging the Challenges
Like any place in the world, Korea isn't perfect, but it's about finding a balance that works for you personally. In my case, there are certainly some challenges I face: the fine dust means I don't get to see clear blue skies as often as I'd like, the summers can be quite intense, and there's constant construction noise in my neighborhood (in just two years, I've watched at least 10 buildings being demolished and rebuilt!).
However, these downsides feel manageable because I've learned how to work around them. Like traveling back to Germany during summer to cool down or just work at a cafe during constructions hours and not at home.
When weighed against all the benefits Korea offers, these challenges don't significantly impact my quality of life here.
To make this evaluation, consider asking yourself these key questions once in a while:
- Can you adapt to and appreciate the local culture while maintaining your personal boundaries?
- Does the lifestyle align with your long-term goals and values?
- Are the opportunities available here supporting your personal and professional growth?
- Have you built a sustainable support system and community?
Remember that it's perfectly normal for your feelings about living in Korea to evolve over time. What works for you now might change, and that's okay. The key is to regularly reassess your situation and make adjustments as needed.
The Local Perspective
I deeply understand their perspective, having come from Germany. Many Koreans see Germany as an idealized paradise of social security and civility, a romanticized version largely based on stories from the 1970s rather than today's reality. Similarly, the Korean media often portrays life abroad through rose-tinted glasses, creating unrealistic expectations.
Koreans face pressures that most foreigners don't experience:
- Intense societal pressure to achieve specific life milestones by certain ages
- Constant comparison with peers in education, career, and personal life
- The burden of maintaining family expectations while pursuing personal goals
- A demanding work culture that often leads to burnout
Without experiencing life abroad long-term, many Koreans assume every developed country offers the same conveniences and safety as Korea, plus better social security. However, they're often unprepared for the reality, experiencing racism for the first time, having their phones stolen (something rare in Korea), and facing unexpected cultural differences.
For instance, they might be shocked to discover that not shops open everyday (Closed on Sundays) or efficient public transportation. The constant exposure to media highlighting social issues and political tensions at home, combined with this idealized view of life abroad, only amplifies their feelings of discontent. The truth is, every country comes with its own set of trade-offs and compromises, there's no perfect system.
Conclusion
Don't let media narratives and unrealistic expectations shape your decision about where to live. Whether you're Korean dreaming of life abroad or a foreigner considering Korea, it's important to evaluate what truly matters to you personally. Living in a new country should be a carefully considered choice based on your values, goals, and lifestyle preferences, not just following trends or fleeting interests.
If you're interested in Korea, take small, intentional steps. Start by visiting, immersing yourself in the culture, and most importantly, connecting with people who have made their lives here. Ask them about their challenges, their reasons for staying, and how they've adapted to life in Korea. Their experiences can provide valuable insights beyond what you'll find in media portrayals or tourist guides.
And to those reading this who are currently living in Korea or have lived here before. I'm curious to hear your perspective: "Why do you live in Korea?" Share your story in the comments below.
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Kim Ninja (Nguyen Huy Kim)
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